Obvious Troll

Current Life Status: Not dead, just fat as fuck.

Troll is Gabe Newell only poor, insecure, unloved, uglier, and gay (for dogs, horses, and dolphins)


Every few months Troll decides to dick around with a different Linux distro for no goddamn reason. This invariably leads to Troll fucking up all his Windows partitions and being forced to fuck around in faggy OSX while frantically trying to fix whatever stupid problem he caused. Goddamn Linux is gay.


Troll's latest sad sack of shit and fail, a homemade depiction of doeass


Likes drinking, taking pills, watching porn, and having car sex with Adcat, his sexy white Porsche.


He also wants Azker to buy his mother then make porn videos starring her AZKER DELIVERS.


Artist's Hanny's depiction of Troll's room.



2:42 PM - Obvious Troll: nice cheap camera
2:42 PM - Obvious Troll: enjoy your shitty lenses
2:42 PM - Faith!: I couldve spent that money on buying your mom as a sex slave for the rest of her life but I decided she was only worth half that
2:42 PM - Faith!: O SNAP
2:42 PM - Obvious Troll: you should have
2:42 PM - Faith!: and they really arent shitty lenses
2:43 PM - Faith!: except the tele kit
2:43 PM - Obvious Troll: then you could have made me some videos
2:43 PM - Faith!: D:
2:44 PM - Faith!: >He also wants Azker to buy his mother then make porn videos starring her.
2:44 PM - Faith!: put that in your page okay

2:49 PM - Obvious Troll: i cum in adcat so hard that it gets up into her exhaust manifold
2:49 PM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: The A/C smells of dicks
2:50 PM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: The fuel gauge says full
2:50 PM - Obvious Troll: oh god typing that sentence made me hard
2:50 PM - Obvious Troll: what has become of me

5:41 PM - ReesesPoofs: jesus fucking christ
5:41 PM - ReesesPoofs: is this entire stuffs.zip dolphin porno
5:41 PM - Obvious Troll: yes
5:41 PM - Hanny Montanny giggles
5:41 PM - Obvious Troll: it is the only zip file you will ever need
5:42 PM - NATESOR: ^ troll's life purpose is now complete

3:52 AM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: I expect troll to have a massive hangover when I wake up
3:52 AM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: Or continue to be in a long-term drunk stupor

7:48 AM - Obvious Troll: oh god i'm still drunk
7:48 AM - Obvious Troll: :awesome:

11:03 PM - Obvious Troll: mallory
11:04 PM - Mallory: yes?
11:04 PM - Obvious Troll: i'm dropping my dad off at the airport there in 2 days, then i'm driving to phoenix by myself
11:04 PM - Mallory: i'm not in minneapolis anymore
11:04 PM - Obvious Troll: i'm going to treat it like an irl game of the oregon trail
11:04 PM - Uncle Phil: elope
11:04 PM - Obvious Troll: would you like to come with me
11:04 PM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: Oh my god
11:04 PM - Mallory: no you'll ford the wagon and suicide
11:04 PM - Interior Crocodile Alligator: I wish I could come
11:04 PM - Mallory: looking for dolphins or something
11:04 PM - NATESOR: oregon trail pick up line: pro

1:24 AM - Obvious T. Roll: oh god
1:25 AM - ={Crayven}= Ayumi: having a good time troll
1:25 AM - ={Crayven}= Ayumi: ?
1:25 AM - Obvious T. Roll: corvus don't you ever make me do that again
-Troll after going to fourth on DXM

5:02 PM - Kapitän Trollhab: corvus
5:02 PM - Kapitän Trollhab: http://tinychat.com/namsla/
5:02 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: the torture has finally produced results
5:04 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: why would you do this
5:04 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: HOLY SHIT
5:05 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: holy shit
5:05 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: azker troll just guzzled a swig of campari
5:05 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: straight from the bottle
5:05 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: and didnt make a face
5:05 PM - Shebureimoobiteata: bullshit
5:05 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: he did it on cam
5:06 PM - Shebureimoobiteata: wat
5:06 PM - Kapitän Trollhab: lol
5:06 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: hes like manlier than the hariest most muscular whoremongering guido
5:07 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: monty
5:07 PM - ={人造人間}= あゆ美: get in tiny chat
5:07 PM - Kapitän Trollhab: i'll do it again if azker gets on cam
5:07 PM - Shebureimoobiteata: assuming he did it for real
5:07 PM - Shebureimoobiteata: he's not human

[21:06] troll: fuck i'm out of wild turkey
[21:06] troll: FUCK
[21:06] troll: look what you made me do nate
[21:06] troll: fuck it
[21:06] crew: he made you go gay
[21:06] troll: where's my 151
[21:07] natesor: 151 straight
[21:07] troll: mmmm 75.5% ABV
[21:07] natesor: troll is a krogan

6:36 AM - The New Flesh: GETONTHEBALL.jpg http://i26.tinypic.com/357jwk3.jpg
10:45 AM - D I O 様: how drunk are you
10:46 AM - Kapitän Trollhab: pretty drunk
10:46 AM - Kapitän Trollhab: why
10:46 AM - D I O 様: because you just posted cockpix

The New Flesh: monty is more of a woman than snoobz is
ε: bideo games: thats only cus shes a pirate
ε: bideo games: she more man than you troll
ε: bideo games: so is freddie mercury

Chat Logs

Tails and Tailpipes: A Dragon-Car Romance
Troll says it's ok to fuck anything.

See Also

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